Thursday, January 17, 2008


I went to a seminar today on grant writing. I came out with my head spinning.

Life is full of struggle. I considered recently, going and getting a “normal” job to escape the struggle of fundraising. In my thinking, if I had regular employment that didn’t depend on my understanding of grant writing, supporter communication, and non-profit marketing, I would have more time to do the things that really count for the Kingdom. But my father gently pointed out that a career is just as consuming if not more so of my time, energy, and efforts and could very well lead me into a greater struggle than I am facing now.

So then I am faced with the question, do I push through this struggle to higher places knowing that with each mountain I cross I will see another? Or do I pull back and try to find a plate where I can live out my life in relative ease. But even maintaining the status quo takes some sort of struggle. So in the end, if I am avoiding struggle altogether then I would have to conform to the ideals of Buddhism which states that all life is suffering. Our main mission in life is to detach ourselves from suffering through abandonment of family, identity, and minimizing need to that of the most basic necessities of life.

Knowing that this extreme is not an option for me, I must choose the other extreme. Daily in life there is struggle. I choose to face this with courage. But more than anything I choose to look to Jesus, knowing that the Kingdoms of this world are becoming the Kingdom of the Beloved Son. I struggle not for myself, but for the sake of the Kingdom.

Lord, success is hearing Your voice. And in hearing Your voice...I find such joy and rest.